“Trust in your plans will all your heart, and lean on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him superficially, and in the end, He will redirect your path” – A parody of Proverbs 3:5-6 that otherwise rings true to me
I think it was last year, during the ice cream plant commissioning, that I learned to plan in a detailed manner. We were running on a tight 24-hour operation schedule, and we needed to have our cards laid down properly so that no time will be wasted, for ‘downtime’ always meant increased expenses in the manufacturing industry (labor costs, utilities, low productivity and output, etc). We slated our production schedule on hour-by-hour bar graphs on a spreadsheet, and religiously checked if we were still ‘right on schedule’. Delays were not taken lightly, and only added to our frustration. The plans after all, had little room for error.
Subconsciously, I have learned to adopt those ‘planning skills’ on a personal level. I started scheduling my to-do-list; setting minimum/maximum hours for activities like reading and watching media; planning precise routes to take; mentally rehearsing things to say and do; predicting plans based on people’s responses, etc. I have been doing them in the past, only this time, the difference is, ibang level na. Ibang level rin ang nagiging frustration at disappointment ko pag di natutuloy ang plano.
Sometimes it involves simple things like planning home on Saturday morning instead of Friday night. Then at the next moment finding myself home 12 hours early, an umbrella poorer, and carrying a smaller bag that was 6 kilograms lighter than my average one. At times, there are events that are totally out of my control, like having a climb moved, and then canceled entirely, after starting to invest in stuff that would otherwise not be necessary (like a sleeping bag). Some unexpected turn of events are of benefit, though, like when we were asked to move to our new, bigger apartment for the same price as the old one. Then there are those life plans that I chose to alter, albeit sadly, against my personal will.
At times I questioned God for allowing such things to happen, or why a wrench had to be thrown into smoothly rolling gears. Then I realize that the root of all these is a lack of faith in the sovereignty of God. In His permissive will, He has allowed such events to take place. At times it may be for us to learn a lesson or two, and always to make us realize that we may be relying too much on our own selves.
“My son, you are free to make plans, but don’t be disappointed when they don’t push through as expected. It happens to every one. I tell you the truth, My plans cannot be thwarted. Though you do not know My exact plans for you, the only thing I could promise you is that everything I willed for you -even before you were conceived- will take place without fail. It is not your duty to sulk whenever you don’t get your way. Your duty is to be obedient to me. To go where I tell you to, when I tell you to do so, and to do what I tell you to do. Read My word, seek My face, listen to My voice, feel My heart.”
I have told a couple of my friends that this will be a year of risks and rewards. I know it will still be like that, only now I’m more uncertain about what kind or risks there are, and what kind of rewards await.
and so, I with that, I pray…
…let Your will be done